Man Walks Into a Bar Jokes

[Nazz]

A blind man walks into a bar with a seeing-eye dog. When he reaches the center of the bar, he snatches up the dog by his collar and starts spinning him around.

The bartender says "Hey, what the hell are you doing?"

The blind man says, "Just taking a look around"..

-- -- -- -- -- -- --

A rabbi, a priest, and a bishop walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

-- -- -- -- -- -- --

A penguin walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "Have you seen my brother?" Bartender says, "what does he look like?"

bodda-boomp..

[Doreen Peri]

A rabbi, a priest, and a bishop walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

Hahhahaha!

[elianna]

Tales From The Shire
Two hobbits walk into a bar where one of them picks up a barfly. They taker her to a local motel; the first hobbit goes into the motel room while the other waits outside. Once the door closes, the hobbit on the outside hears strange noises through the door, "I can't do it, I can't do it, I CAN'T DO IT!"
In the morning, the second hobbit askes the first, "How did it go?" The first one answers. "It was embarrassing. I simply couldn't do it."

The second hobbit shook his head. "Manhood problems, eh?"

"No. I couldn't get on the bed!"

[bennie2]

two owls walk into a bar and order some drinks. they sit at a table. the first owl says to the second, "this is a pretty cool place. I've never been in here before. like it?" the second owl says, "yep."



see, this is funny for two main reason. 1) owls don't often consume alcohol (squirrels on the other hand.... ). and B) owls can't talk. hahahaha..... haha....

[Lightning Rod]

lightning rod and bennie walk into a bar
they have three single malts apiece
bennie tells a joke
lightning rod just looks stupid

"i don't get it," he says.
"yer not supposed to get it, old man. Don't you get it?"

[bennie2]

three single malts! have you ever had a drink with a scot before? three single malts would fill a hole in my back tooth, man!

what do you like, lr? do you like fiery skull burning red heads or subtle elegant and graceful blondes?

two of my favourites:

for the fiery red head: http://www.laphroaig.com/ (lef roig) http://www.thewhiskystore.de/dist/laphroai/laphroai.wav

the elegant graceful blonde: http://www.isleofjura.com/index2.cfm

[Lightning Rod]

no contest
I like 'em crazy and red headed

[bennie2]

if you can get that then, try it...

It's like a firework show blowing off in your gob! or, permit me to send you some?

It tastes like scotland!

[mtmynd]

never acquired the taste for scotch, but Jura is bottled so beautifully that I'd sample any of it in a hearbeat... grand selection and written about with love. i'm sure I'd be converted...