Seriously, I mean, serrrrriiiiioooously! What is your problem?
You're nothing to me!
And then you insist on saying...
Well you know what you said, you probably still have those words, engraved on some sharp darts , to fire from your mouth, and... don't try to be clever, it doesn't suit you, I'm apathetic, deal with it!
How am I supposed to care, when all I have to care about is everything, and yet nothing effects me?
How am I meant to care, when all around me is a sea of nausea inducing comfort?
I grew up in a world where I saw everything, but at the same time, saw nothing.
So excuse me if I'm different.
And sharp darts don't wound me, don't shock me, don't move me, don't even peirce the skin, or thoughts within, I don't understand the stress and strains, and hopes, and pains, and mental anguish, of a broken wish, cast loose upon the carpet of long forgotten arm twists, chinese burns, wheel turns, 90 miles an hour isn't fast, it's standing still.
Do you expect me to understand the horse and cart, or how we start to proto-analyze the causes of the civil war, when all you have in store is some dust covered battered copy of a politically correct, authored book, written on paper?
OMG! Paper?
Man, I'm surprised anyone ever remembers that.
Where are the gifs, and the flash animations, the swf files, and the big block rocking beats, booming out in the background?
Where's the goatse porn, and a million naked girls, doing obscene things, to each other, for ten bucks, that will be forever posted to the furthest corners of the cyber universe, for a million years to come, and seen by a billion generations?
How am I supposed to concentrate?
And when do I level up?
I mean, come on, 9 to 5, McDonalds?
Are you serious?
Do me a favor, I want to mash some brains, and then power up, take on the level boss, and max out my score, flipping burgers is a bore, it's pointless!
So I'm feeding people?
So what?
What's the point?
Some other sucker will do that.
So exactly why am I supposed to care?
Sure, we've never had it so good, but do you know how annoying that is?
All my heros had it bad, I want it bad, I want a challange, to manage my life, beyond the sterile confusion of pollitical correctness.
I can't scream, I can't shout, I can't call this guy that thing, or that guy this thing, I can't chose my friends, or be a man, I can't be rude, I can't smoke, drink, fart, do drugs, I can't look at women, I can't discriminate against men, I can't use the wrong words, I can't walk on the wrong street, I can't tap my feet to a tune that I want to.
Your world is sterile, and I want to be me, because I'm selfish.
You cut yourself, and you grazed your knee, you straightened two fingers, and they turned into a gun, and you chased your friends through woodlands, shouting "Bang bang, you're dead", but I had to sit home on the internet instead, because you were worried about pedophiles, when half my MSN friends were naked, and on cam, man, you were so blind.
You offered me a world, where my best friend should be an Italian, called Mario, who went to sleep in power cuts, and didn't have the first clue, how to help me cheat in math, but you felt it was safer, to wrap me up in cotton wool, and tell me "there, there, everything will be alright!"
And you ask me now, why our streets run red, with rivers of blood, well I'll tell you, because you bred a generation who were nothing, who are lost, who have no purpose, have no role, have no opinion, they are all unhappy little sterile soldiers, who turn into gansters, and prostitutes, the moment you leave for work.
I know you only ever meant to make a better world, but you sucked the life out of it, you sucked diversity out of it, you sucked opinion out of it, and tried to brain wash us, and make us into drones.
Well you succeeded, we're drones, but bad drones, who drone on, and on, and on, and on...
Seriously, I mean, serrrrriiiiioooously! What is your problem?
You're nothing to me!
Hello Pinky my old friend, I've come to talk to you again...
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stilltrucking
- Posts: 20607
- Joined: October 24th, 2004, 12:29 pm
- Location: Oz or somepLace like Kansas
I can hold a grudge for years.
Sits there festering.
Everytime I become aware of one lurking just below the horizon of my consciousness I try to write about it.
Like an exorcism for me.
I have no idea what it is like to live in your world. We are two generatins apart. But it helps me to read these, it gives me some of idea of what it must be like.. Thanks for the messages from the future will have been.
I wonder how many parents really know where there children are.
Sits there festering.
Everytime I become aware of one lurking just below the horizon of my consciousness I try to write about it.
Like an exorcism for me.
I have no idea what it is like to live in your world. We are two generatins apart. But it helps me to read these, it gives me some of idea of what it must be like.. Thanks for the messages from the future will have been.
I wonder how many parents really know where there children are.
Each generation is angst ridden and "angry", I think what seperates this generation is what they are angry about.
Over the last 150 years there have been legitimate things for people to focus there anger on, slavery, the issue of womens rights, womens suffrage, poverty, civil rights, etc., but today we live in a different world.
We're in the middle of a recession, so I often hear about poverty, but how many of us in the west really know what poverty is, anymore?
When we complain about the latest hike in fuel prices, do we stop and think about some remote tribesman, in Papua New Guinea, who hasn't even seen a car, let alone have the ability, or finances to drive one?
I hear a lot about racism, but look at the President of the United States of America, part black, part white, raised in Hawaii, and Indonesia, so how racist are our lives?
When we complain about racism, because some Tarantino movie used the "N" word, do we stop and think about places like Darfur, where hundreds of thousands have died, because of their race, or ethnicity?
How bad are our lives?
We complain on a daily basis, even though we have little left to personally complain about.
So therefore the angst, and anger, has been turned in on itself, it's rage against the repression of our natural selves.
It's borne of apathy, and self loathing.
Self loathing has been very big in recent years, kids hate themselves, starve themselves, cut themselves, and even kill themselves in many cases.
An example:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2008/feb/20/wales
"Suspected suicides in Bridgend area reach 17 as schoolgirl found hanged"
One small area, and yet 17 young people driven to a state where they felt compelled to take their own lives.
They feel lost, disposessed, stripped of their identity, their purpose, and their being.
It no longer matters if you're young, or old, rich, or poor, male, or female, black, or white, one size fits all.
It's like growing up in a gray uniform, expected to rigidly conform to the thoughts, and ideals of past generations, and osctrasized, if you even dare to think outside the box.
The teaching in school has never been more political, hence my line above "Do you expect me to understand the horse and cart, or how we start to proto-analyze the causes of the civil war, when all you have in store is some dust covered battered copy of a politically correct, authored book, written on paper?"
The student is taught the civil war was about slavery, and nothing else, even though for the majority involved there were other reasons, and causes, and in fact for many slavery wasn't even an issue.
World War II is now a war that was all about jewish people, and concentration camps, or that's how it's taught, no one teaches any other element of it, despite the fact that the vast majority of people were not fighting for, or against, jewish people.
You have a whole semester being taught that 6 million people were killed in concentration camps, and about 20 seconds of the teacher shouting over the ringing bell, that another 70 million people were killed as well, but have been relegated to a footnote in history.
They even teach anti-racist mathematics, I kid you not, math is now deemed racist, do the wrong sum and you're suddenly a hooded member of the KKK, who is out to lynch someone.
Political correctness, and the attempted indoctrination of the current generation of young people has become oppressive, and leads to self loathing, and a new level of anger.
To stick with the issue of race, so much stigma, and anti-white rhetoric now exists, that in my personal experience, and I want to stress this is just my personal experience, that about 40% of my peers are becoming increasingly prejudiced, against other races, as a backlash, whilst about another 40% seek to mimic other races, because they are ashamed of their own race, or culture, with only a minority left who are comfortable with who, and what they are.
The same with the physical body, a percentage now starve themselves, to try and meet an impossible standard, expected of them, and a percentage have given up hope of ever acheiving what's expected of them, and have given over to obeisity, leaving only a minority comfortable with who they are.
These constructed, universaly standards, are stifling young people, with many going to extremes to try to conform to the impossible, whilst others feel like failures, and just give up, taking solace in drugs, alcohol, or violence.
They feel increasingly divorced from the world, and reality, which is hardly surprising, because the world is becoming less and less real, and more and more a moulded gray mass, of uniformity.
They feel increasingly isolated, but often do not know who, or what, to rage against, so they become self destructive, and rage against themselves.
It's like the Eloi, in H. G. Wells' 1895 novel The Time Machine.
Humanity has evolved, and this generation are spoiled, attractive upper class, living in luxury on the surface of the earth.
Or, maybe, in some ways it should be devolved, as an increasing number seem to posess sub-human intelligence, with a primitive language, similar to the language of the Eloi, which was described as "a very sweet and liquid tongue".
In H. G. Wells' novel, having solved all problems that required strength, intelligence, or virtue, the Eloi have slowly become dissolute, frail animals.
Having come through the last 150 years, having solved many of the ills of our world (in the west), this generation is facing a similar position, one where their strength, intelligence, and virtue is no longer required, and they are almost now like battery hens, caged within the confines of modern societies political correctness, with no lateral movement, to grow, or express themselves.
Maybe, deep down, it is natures answer, maybe they rage so that they might destroy the world, and then, when it is laid bare, they may once again find purpose, in rebuilding it.
At any rate, paradise is over rated, and people are now searching for an alternative.
Over the last 150 years there have been legitimate things for people to focus there anger on, slavery, the issue of womens rights, womens suffrage, poverty, civil rights, etc., but today we live in a different world.
We're in the middle of a recession, so I often hear about poverty, but how many of us in the west really know what poverty is, anymore?
When we complain about the latest hike in fuel prices, do we stop and think about some remote tribesman, in Papua New Guinea, who hasn't even seen a car, let alone have the ability, or finances to drive one?
I hear a lot about racism, but look at the President of the United States of America, part black, part white, raised in Hawaii, and Indonesia, so how racist are our lives?
When we complain about racism, because some Tarantino movie used the "N" word, do we stop and think about places like Darfur, where hundreds of thousands have died, because of their race, or ethnicity?
How bad are our lives?
We complain on a daily basis, even though we have little left to personally complain about.
So therefore the angst, and anger, has been turned in on itself, it's rage against the repression of our natural selves.
It's borne of apathy, and self loathing.
Self loathing has been very big in recent years, kids hate themselves, starve themselves, cut themselves, and even kill themselves in many cases.
An example:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2008/feb/20/wales
"Suspected suicides in Bridgend area reach 17 as schoolgirl found hanged"
One small area, and yet 17 young people driven to a state where they felt compelled to take their own lives.
They feel lost, disposessed, stripped of their identity, their purpose, and their being.
It no longer matters if you're young, or old, rich, or poor, male, or female, black, or white, one size fits all.
It's like growing up in a gray uniform, expected to rigidly conform to the thoughts, and ideals of past generations, and osctrasized, if you even dare to think outside the box.
The teaching in school has never been more political, hence my line above "Do you expect me to understand the horse and cart, or how we start to proto-analyze the causes of the civil war, when all you have in store is some dust covered battered copy of a politically correct, authored book, written on paper?"
The student is taught the civil war was about slavery, and nothing else, even though for the majority involved there were other reasons, and causes, and in fact for many slavery wasn't even an issue.
World War II is now a war that was all about jewish people, and concentration camps, or that's how it's taught, no one teaches any other element of it, despite the fact that the vast majority of people were not fighting for, or against, jewish people.
You have a whole semester being taught that 6 million people were killed in concentration camps, and about 20 seconds of the teacher shouting over the ringing bell, that another 70 million people were killed as well, but have been relegated to a footnote in history.
They even teach anti-racist mathematics, I kid you not, math is now deemed racist, do the wrong sum and you're suddenly a hooded member of the KKK, who is out to lynch someone.
Political correctness, and the attempted indoctrination of the current generation of young people has become oppressive, and leads to self loathing, and a new level of anger.
To stick with the issue of race, so much stigma, and anti-white rhetoric now exists, that in my personal experience, and I want to stress this is just my personal experience, that about 40% of my peers are becoming increasingly prejudiced, against other races, as a backlash, whilst about another 40% seek to mimic other races, because they are ashamed of their own race, or culture, with only a minority left who are comfortable with who, and what they are.
The same with the physical body, a percentage now starve themselves, to try and meet an impossible standard, expected of them, and a percentage have given up hope of ever acheiving what's expected of them, and have given over to obeisity, leaving only a minority comfortable with who they are.
These constructed, universaly standards, are stifling young people, with many going to extremes to try to conform to the impossible, whilst others feel like failures, and just give up, taking solace in drugs, alcohol, or violence.
They feel increasingly divorced from the world, and reality, which is hardly surprising, because the world is becoming less and less real, and more and more a moulded gray mass, of uniformity.
They feel increasingly isolated, but often do not know who, or what, to rage against, so they become self destructive, and rage against themselves.
It's like the Eloi, in H. G. Wells' 1895 novel The Time Machine.
Humanity has evolved, and this generation are spoiled, attractive upper class, living in luxury on the surface of the earth.
Or, maybe, in some ways it should be devolved, as an increasing number seem to posess sub-human intelligence, with a primitive language, similar to the language of the Eloi, which was described as "a very sweet and liquid tongue".
In H. G. Wells' novel, having solved all problems that required strength, intelligence, or virtue, the Eloi have slowly become dissolute, frail animals.
Having come through the last 150 years, having solved many of the ills of our world (in the west), this generation is facing a similar position, one where their strength, intelligence, and virtue is no longer required, and they are almost now like battery hens, caged within the confines of modern societies political correctness, with no lateral movement, to grow, or express themselves.
Maybe, deep down, it is natures answer, maybe they rage so that they might destroy the world, and then, when it is laid bare, they may once again find purpose, in rebuilding it.
At any rate, paradise is over rated, and people are now searching for an alternative.
-
Doreen Peri
- Site Admin
- Posts: 14539
- Joined: July 10th, 2004, 3:30 pm
- Location: Virginia
- Contact:
just replying to the first piece ... didn't read the following comments yet.. i will just haven't yet
initial post is powerful and raw... fine gutsy writing
loved the use of interior rhyme and rhythm
would sound great spoken ... i can hear it in my head
do you ever do spoken word on stage or recorded?
would love to hear this
initial post is powerful and raw... fine gutsy writing
loved the use of interior rhyme and rhythm
would sound great spoken ... i can hear it in my head
do you ever do spoken word on stage or recorded?
would love to hear this
That's ok, I can talk a lot loldoreen peri wrote:just replying to the first piece ... didn't read the following comments yet.. i will just haven't yet
If ANYONE here EVER reads every word I write, well... they need to get a life, because I write to much.
Thank youinitial post is powerful and raw... fine gutsy writing
loved the use of interior rhyme and rhythm
would sound great spoken ... i can hear it in my head
I've done so, a few times, but not that often.do you ever do spoken word on stage or recorded?
I did make a number of videos last year, that had a lot of spoken word stuff in, but then I had a computer melt down, and they were lost forever.
I know, back everything up, but... I'm just to lazy for that lol
I also did a few shoutcast radio shows last Spring, and Summer, but... it just wasnt to be, the station we had running ran out of steam, so we closed it down.
I guess we were to ambitious with the project, we launched it as 24/7, music and word, and that's a lot of hours to fill, which requires a lot of material, so we had to pad it out with other peoples works, which lead to liscense costs, as well as server costs, and... I think in the end we'd run the bills up to around $30 a month, which isn't a huge amount of money, but it is when you're spending that on a service and project, running 24 hours a day, and for 16 of those hours one, or sometimes even less, people are listening.
We lost heart, we closed.
After that I guested on a few other shows, mainly country music shows, and mainly musical stuff, rather than spoken word stuff, before the meltdown.
Since I've been back, nothing.
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stilltrucking
- Posts: 20607
- Joined: October 24th, 2004, 12:29 pm
- Location: Oz or somepLace like Kansas
we are three generations apart
I was born before world war two.
Yes it is a wonderful world we live in
we old fuckers don't have time to be outraged much
We have the AARP to look out for us.
we really don't give a dam
I don't trust anybody under thirty myself
I have had suicidal thoughts since i was eight years old.
BUt I hardly have then anymore now that I am moving on inyears
Except for an occasional cigarette I hardly think about it anymore.
A closet a coat hook and a belt. What the hell was I thinking in 1948?
To this day I can not bear to wear a turtle necked sweater,
I have a streak of sarcasm a mile wide
I am crazy jack son of crazy mike who when my baby sister came running up to him so proud of her self after a swimming lesson and said "daddy daddy I can float" and he said so can shit.
I can not imagine what school must be like these days. So many myths I was taught. Even in the sciences.
I have always wanted to be a footnote to history, but I think I blew it.
Has humanity evolved,? Not so much biologically I think. Our cutlure has our technology, but I think we still have the same nervous system as our Cro Magnon ancestors of 35,000 BCE. The same brain and our marvelous thumbs and trigger fingers.
I sometimes think that the thousands of chemicals (2500 food additives for example) we put into our bodies are going to make some marvelous changes in our evolution.
I wish I was a Hindu sometimes or at least a Catholic. I need some structure to my mythology.
I was born before world war two.
Yes it is a wonderful world we live in
we old fuckers don't have time to be outraged much
We have the AARP to look out for us.
we really don't give a dam
I don't trust anybody under thirty myself
I have had suicidal thoughts since i was eight years old.
BUt I hardly have then anymore now that I am moving on inyears
Except for an occasional cigarette I hardly think about it anymore.
A closet a coat hook and a belt. What the hell was I thinking in 1948?
To this day I can not bear to wear a turtle necked sweater,
I have a streak of sarcasm a mile wide
I am crazy jack son of crazy mike who when my baby sister came running up to him so proud of her self after a swimming lesson and said "daddy daddy I can float" and he said so can shit.
I can not imagine what school must be like these days. So many myths I was taught. Even in the sciences.
I have always wanted to be a footnote to history, but I think I blew it.
Has humanity evolved,? Not so much biologically I think. Our cutlure has our technology, but I think we still have the same nervous system as our Cro Magnon ancestors of 35,000 BCE. The same brain and our marvelous thumbs and trigger fingers.
I sometimes think that the thousands of chemicals (2500 food additives for example) we put into our bodies are going to make some marvelous changes in our evolution.
I wish I was a Hindu sometimes or at least a Catholic. I need some structure to my mythology.
Last edited by stilltrucking on March 6th, 2009, 11:34 pm, edited 2 times in total.
A bazillion years ago a bunch of people moved west, and seeing as there was barely anyone out there, when they made their little settlements, there were no rules, or law and order.
Now, when there's no law and order, that can be a good thing, I mean there's no big brother watching over you, but on the other hand it can be a bad thing, as you get another breed of people with the attitude of "hey, there's no law and order here, so I can screw over anyone I want, and no one can do a damn think about it, so I think that's what I'll do", and they did.
Now when the other people looked up, and saw brown fecal matter raining down upon them, they said "hey, I don't like this, we need to get ourselves some law and order" so that's what they did, they hired themselves some sharp shooting sherrifs and deputies.
Now this was all well and good, because these sharp shooters ran the bad men out of town, but the trouble was, when the bad men had gone, they were left with these gun totting sherrifs, that kind of made the place look bad, so they started to get rid of them.
& so it went on.
I saw an episode of the Simpsons once, Bart saves a lizard, and the lizard is a bird eating lizard, so they bring in snakes to eat the lizards, and then monkeys to chase off the snakes, and then bears to chase off the monkeys, and so on.
It's kind of the same thing.
It's like a food chain, and we've reached the end, all the bad things are gone, all the things to complain about are gone, so now we've relaxed, and so the cycle is complete, and we breed a new generation of bad men, that the next generation of sherrifs will have to run out of town.
It's the dawning of a black hat era, so I wouldn't trust anyone under 30 either (and I'm one of them...)
Now, when there's no law and order, that can be a good thing, I mean there's no big brother watching over you, but on the other hand it can be a bad thing, as you get another breed of people with the attitude of "hey, there's no law and order here, so I can screw over anyone I want, and no one can do a damn think about it, so I think that's what I'll do", and they did.
Now when the other people looked up, and saw brown fecal matter raining down upon them, they said "hey, I don't like this, we need to get ourselves some law and order" so that's what they did, they hired themselves some sharp shooting sherrifs and deputies.
Now this was all well and good, because these sharp shooters ran the bad men out of town, but the trouble was, when the bad men had gone, they were left with these gun totting sherrifs, that kind of made the place look bad, so they started to get rid of them.
& so it went on.
I saw an episode of the Simpsons once, Bart saves a lizard, and the lizard is a bird eating lizard, so they bring in snakes to eat the lizards, and then monkeys to chase off the snakes, and then bears to chase off the monkeys, and so on.
It's kind of the same thing.
It's like a food chain, and we've reached the end, all the bad things are gone, all the things to complain about are gone, so now we've relaxed, and so the cycle is complete, and we breed a new generation of bad men, that the next generation of sherrifs will have to run out of town.
It's the dawning of a black hat era, so I wouldn't trust anyone under 30 either (and I'm one of them...)
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stilltrucking
- Posts: 20607
- Joined: October 24th, 2004, 12:29 pm
- Location: Oz or somepLace like Kansas
We hardly live in the same world
you have never taken a wheel barrel of money to the store to buy a loaf of bread.
I do it every couple days.
A lot of people are still pissed at their parents for ruining their child hood
Historically men choose bread over freedom
"The more decadent a society the more laws there are" Brittany Spears.
you have never taken a wheel barrel of money to the store to buy a loaf of bread.
I do it every couple days.
A lot of people are still pissed at their parents for ruining their child hood
Historically men choose bread over freedom
"The more decadent a society the more laws there are" Brittany Spears.
Man is fuelled by greed, and when over fuelled he runs around in circles
"The more laws there are the more crimes there will be" ~ Lao Tzu
I guess Miss Spears said it best when she said "Hit Me Baby One More Time"
I had a theory, when I was younger, which wasn't that long ago, that mans greed lobe (I'm sure there must be one), is located to one side of his brain, and if it gets over inflated it causes an imbalance in the brain, and for one side of the brain to be heavier than the other, which in turn would cause him to run around in circles.
"God is dead. God remains dead. And we have killed him." ~ The men of Poughkeepsie.
"The more laws there are the more crimes there will be" ~ Lao Tzu
I guess Miss Spears said it best when she said "Hit Me Baby One More Time"
I had a theory, when I was younger, which wasn't that long ago, that mans greed lobe (I'm sure there must be one), is located to one side of his brain, and if it gets over inflated it causes an imbalance in the brain, and for one side of the brain to be heavier than the other, which in turn would cause him to run around in circles.
"God is dead. God remains dead. And we have killed him." ~ The men of Poughkeepsie.
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stilltrucking
- Posts: 20607
- Joined: October 24th, 2004, 12:29 pm
- Location: Oz or somepLace like Kansas
-
stilltrucking
- Posts: 20607
- Joined: October 24th, 2004, 12:29 pm
- Location: Oz or somepLace like Kansas
Every day it kicks in for me
there is always a headline, or a breaking news story to remind me.
I think about Rwanda a lot, a very much a lot. More than I think about Auschwitz, or at least as often.
But that is history, everybody said they are sorry, even Bill Clinton. so we can forget about that.
What can I say about sarcasm? I spent my life in dread of being my father's son.
I am a real live nephew of my Uncle Sam born in a ghetto in Poland.
I am a first generation American, I am one of the people chosen to be road kill on the road to Damascus, I am these photons bouncing off this screen.
I am a Masada phobiac
but you are wrong about me mud shark, I never was a Nazi.
Thinking about Bill Hicks today, never heard of him before LRod mentioned him in a column today. A funny guy may he rest in peace.
<center>
We humans are
sorry Danny
not to hijack your thread.
"Hello darkness my old friend"
there is always a headline, or a breaking news story to remind me.
I think about Rwanda a lot, a very much a lot. More than I think about Auschwitz, or at least as often.
But that is history, everybody said they are sorry, even Bill Clinton. so we can forget about that.
What can I say about sarcasm? I spent my life in dread of being my father's son.
I am a real live nephew of my Uncle Sam born in a ghetto in Poland.
I am a first generation American, I am one of the people chosen to be road kill on the road to Damascus, I am these photons bouncing off this screen.
I am a Masada phobiac
but you are wrong about me mud shark, I never was a Nazi.
Thinking about Bill Hicks today, never heard of him before LRod mentioned him in a column today. A funny guy may he rest in peace.
I am so impressed with Rwanda, that was good genocide, almost a million people murdered in a couple weeks the old fashioned way, sticks and stones and machetes, no German ingenuity required."Hitler had the right idea, he was just an underachiever. ...Bill Hicks"
<center>
We humans are
It is two am and I am writing some crazy shit,fearfully and wonderfully made
---KJV
</center>Beware thoughts that come in the night. They aren't turned properly; they come in askew, free of sense and restriction, deriving from the most remote of sources...
...William Least Heat Moon
Blue Highways
sorry Danny
not to hijack your thread.
"Hello darkness my old friend"
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stilltrucking
- Posts: 20607
- Joined: October 24th, 2004, 12:29 pm
- Location: Oz or somepLace like Kansas
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