"If you saved a dollar a day ....

[Doreen Peri]

My grandmother used to always say,

"If you saved a dollar a day, every day for a year, you'd be surprised how much money you'd have at the end of the year!"

And we'd answer, every time....

"I'd be surprised if it were anything other than $365."

[bennie]

grans always say shit like that.

I told her that the lottery is a tax on the stupid and the five quid per week she spends on lottery tickets each week would give her £260 at the end of the year.

Her reply? "Yes, but then I wouldn't get that wee bit of excitement every Saturday night, would I?"

She also asked me before I left this afternoon if I'd put a record on for her.

"you don't have a record player, gran."

"yes I do. You and Nicola (my wee sister) bought me it for my Christmas."

"oh...."

She meant a DVD. She sometimes calls it a VD player.

"my grandchildren gave me VD for my christmas."

Oh how we laughed around the Xmas turkey...

[Lightning Rod]

bennie,

here is a verse that was originally written for my tune No Reggae in Texas

http://doreenperi.com/noreggae.mov

"Don't play no Lotto in Texas
we only work for our pay
Don't play no Lotto in Texas
It's a tax on Stupid
and one I don't have to pay."

I excised it from the tune for purposes of brevity.