PEACE or a Fable Of THE BUTTERFLY AND THE RAVEN

[sooZen]

(from my journal...)

PEACE, such a beautiful word. Such a beautiful concept but finding PEACE sometimes seems like chasing a butterfly… It flits here, lands there, blows in the wind, gets tattered and is sometimes caught by a passing raven (that naughty black bird!)… its’ beauty destroyed.

PEACE is illusive or so I used to think… What with the deaths in the family, the loss of abilities (my livelihood), Nathan’s & my health issues last year, the stuff piling up around me… lots and lots of stuff!!! Sheesh! It just made finding PEACE seem an impossibility. (Frankly tho, that was Susan’s illusion.)

PEACE was right inside me all along. Right where it has always been and the darkness (my analogy is that raven snatching my peaceful butterfly) was illuminated by a realization (that Eureka moment!) that PEACE resides not outside SooZen, but within that gal. (Hello!) I took on the world’s ills, felt responsible for people’s anger, thought I could fix things if only they were done like I thought they should be. Hah!

PEACE, silly SooZ, can’t be caught without destroying it. You cannot force inner peace. I find it comes in those moments when I just let it be, let it exist within the chaos that whirls around (and without) me it settles on the flower of my being. This is basically what my meditation is. Taking a bit of time to just be a butterfly without the worries of the past, the specters of the future become the focus of my life. (Oh yeah SooZ? That sounds simple, too simple maybe?) I cannot eliminate that black bird, nor should I. Both are needed and essential.

PEACE is absolutely simplicity. The more simple things are, the more PEACE I find…

Anastasiya Goers, a zen blogger and strategizer, talks about there being “7 Steps to Inner Simplicity” and these are great steps to knowing who Susan Elizabeth Appleby Lee is (Note: the commentary is mine):

1. Become aware That means, know yourself first and I do this by practicing meditation daily. It is a part of my routine.

2. Allow yourself to be bored Hah! I think this is a tough one for most people I know. Allowing oneself to just sit, or think, or pray or whatever one does for 15 to 30 minutes a day when there is soooo much to do (sound familiar?) can be difficult but it really helps me.

3. Forgive Start with oneself (a toughie) and realize that “It is what it is” and none of us can change the past, no matter how painful the incident or memory. Be kind to yourself, kindness will follow…

4. Resign as General Manager of the Universe Whoops! I am not in charge? (Hah Suzy, just when you thought you were!) There are mysteries out there that are beyond understanding in simple human terms. Some put a name to it but for me, it just helps to know that I am not responsible for the workings or what happens in this world and beyond. I just trust that all will be as it should.

5. Practice Positive Realism You may wonder (like I did) “what the heck is she talking about?” There is order in the Uni-verse i.e. birth, life, death and the stuff that happens in between that order. With a bit of practice, it makes sense and became, for me, apparent that all was in good working order. She talks of being positive but prepared for whatever may happen (I guarantee that “whatever” will happen but don’t sit around waiting for it!)

6. Write It Down Hey, I got this one down pat! Letting all that stuff that clutters my mind (memories, thoughts, plans, ideas, lists) are best put to paper (or a blog) and any place you want to write will do. Once you get it down, you can rest easier, especially if you are like me and have a very cluttered mind!

7. Organize Your Routines Firstly, one must have a “routine” and DS son Nathan has been the best example to me of what that is all about… (He has this one down(s) *wink* pat.) So I wake up, pee, let the doggies out, take a pill, turn on the coffee maker, go out into the darkened deck, light some incense and a candle, meditate, stretch, write, research, etc. etc. etc. And I try and eliminate “time wasters” during a busy day (or at least moderate them like TV and social media. There is time for that laters…)

PEACE can be found in so many places but the first place to look is inside our own selves. Bless those peacemakers all around us like that Jesuit pope Francis that is stirring up the pot right this minute. Like Martin Luther King, like Mother Teresa, like Mahatmas Gandhi, like Nelson Mandela, and all of the “saviors” that are legend, be a peacemaker and never give up your principles or beliefs…

PEACE my friends,
S.E.A.Lee
09/23/2015
(Goodbye Yogi Berra..)
“Nate Day”
7:04 am

[saw]

Wonderful !....I too have reached this place in the last 3 years....point by point that you made

so nice to know there are others out there..ha ha....but of course these personal truths wee not a laughing matter before the "awakening".....

I've had two kids with leukemia, even thought he docs looked me in the eye and said there is no hereditary link to children's leukemia....to which I replied, of course there is, you just don't know what it is yet....they're both doing OK, though no one escapes Chemo, Scott free

Then there was my addicted wife......big time stress....it took 3 years to heal myself by coming to all the realizations that you have.....so thank you for sharing

and best of luck in the future

[sooZen]

Thank you Saw for the comments...

Wonderful !....I too have reached this place in the last 3 years....point by point that you made

so nice to know there are others out there..ha ha....but of course these personal truths wee not a laughing matter before the "awakening".....

I've had two kids with leukemia, even thought he docs looked me in the eye and said there is no hereditary link to children's leukemia....to which I replied, of course there is, you just don't know what it is yet....they're both doing OK, though no one escapes Chemo, Scott free

Then there was my addicted wife......big time stress....it took 3 years to heal myself by coming to all the realizations that you have.....so thank you for sharing

and best of luck in the future

As you may or may not know, my DS son was diagnosed w/acute meyelocytic leukemia when he was 22 mos, he is now approaching 40. I started a parents support group for families of children with cancer then along with a small group of parents here because we believed there is no better advocate for our children but us, the parents. Doctors are not gods and make mistakes aplenty as you probably know.

His diagnosis inspired a lot of things for me. I served as President of the Candlelighter's National Foundation, wrote grants (never done that before!), started a summer camp for the kids and a sibling camp (for the one who tended to be "left out" like my other son. He was a teen volunteer there.) Yadda, yadda, yadda and all because of one tiny little baby now grown...that graced me with his presence. None of us would like to go through this fire walk but walk we must. You sound like you learned the lessons and found the center of what is Peace. Best of luck to you too my friend...