Studio8 - Uniting the Arts

fat mist-struck raindrops
bounce off street lamp
playing bongo on leaves
these dark times of sleepless nights
brain races through dilemmas

alone in a world of uncertainty
strange paws through hidden paths
creatures speaking code
linked in parallel planets
me an alien in distress

once i had a partner
ever present counselor
together we'd navigate
discover surprise, delight in mysteries
laugh at our psychoses

but this little child is now alone
waiting for the guillotine to fall
imagining life without a body part
a brain without a memory
in constant anxiety and dread

- judih
one of those weeks filled with nights before

the trees are in flux
is it hibernation
or is it a life change
or a mixture of both
we live a life constant
filled with seemingly
needless
just as important as
anything thought
things may come and go
but they never leave
subtraction is impossble
we may only know dissociation

Reminds me of the time when I was three,
That I stood really still and tried to mime a tree,
It was autumn and I got covered with leaves,
So I got antsy and decided to rake them up...
***
Disassociate! Be the tree, be the last leaf on the tree,
Before the frost gets you and you float on down
To that great empire of clay...To be warmed up
By the coming of noonday.

Judih, I can't believe
anyone would ever walk away
from beautiful you. I saw lots of shots of you.
Couldn't get enough!

I love you completely.
It's too bad you know me so well.
i am a trainwreck on overtime

I am also losing my partner
altho I never called her that!
She is becoming fearful and paranoid
and self-centered and moving on from
this train wrecked vagabond sun·dered them!
and it's sad, but i realise I am outside of her scope mouthwash
and it's sad, but it will be difficult to retain a freindship with her and my soon to be ex-step grandson, now 13, who I hugged Saturday before soccer grandma and he left, then to do some shopping afterwards, her routine.

I now have a beautiful 36 year old daughter! She lives in New york City!
I now have a 25 year old Godson, down and out in St Petersburg!

I am renewing my faith now in a less theological way
and in a more personal way, so that the struggles
toward the building up of spirit can become truly victorious.
There is no other way! We can NOT concede defeat of spirit!!!!

I am getting new digs, homey! Across from Rolling Oats cafe and store,
uptown a mile, nice old friendly neighborhood. I can walk to Tai Chi, a world class new center 1/2 mile down. I am back in my old life drawing group Saturdays! Old friends and now I have the ability to see positives and give encouragements to those who are so invested in their paintings that it is truly beyond ego, I enjoyed it tremendously. They have a new nice studio, third floor of the Borean Art Center, St. Pete!!!!!!!!!

The Quaker Meeting House is yielding to my Karma.
Jesus it is a strong place, very special. I met a man yesterday who had been the only white guy up from Greenville(?) NC, a graduate of nearby Guilford College, Friends schoolin', and was there for Rev MLKing's "I Have a Dream!" speech in DC in 1963....and the wopnderful lady who was traumatised working in a building across the street from the world trade center

no word jams here
i told her about this place
she is Buddhist Quaker
the most lovely 60 + lady
married

i told her i have to meet her
(at meeting)

I am boring into the insensitives
getting beyond their straight smiles
with passion, what else!!!!!

Judih! I am so blessed to be in company with you.
We are still growing. You are more beautiful than ever.....

in flux
changes
stretching again
just like old times
dharma bum living
not so green now
not so tenderfoot now
can i call a lady
from 6,000 miles away?
i can feel her breath on my breast.

woh! lift up and take off
thank you!
wow.

i'm with my live-in mate.
'the partner' i was speaking about was another person, not a mate, but a soulmate.
it hurts to leave an astro travelling comrade,
sometimes it hurts unbearably

but come t'ai chi with a re-balancing community
the battery will re-charge
and life will glow with new potential

yeah like i said
i am an emotional wreck
after saving the world
i give up

save the world
rest
repeat

stir in a little insanity
strain out the hopelessness
pour into a heart shaped pan
and bake

soul mates
share sole fates
even when the surface of things
appears you're separated

sole mate and you
forever blended and amended
from each stroke
of the cosmic spoon of life
from each time life has stirred you round and round
mixed you for baking

left you a home made goody ...
whose only purpose is for sharing

add some tea, and jam ...

let the hot tea and fresh-baked smells sooth your heart, and lift your woes away

deb, thank you for the baked goods

nourishment
sublime mixing of hearts
gathering of forces
together we're energized

soul mates sole fates

ten four jimboloco I gave up too
been a load off my mind
they say "religion is the smile on a dog"

it a hazy lazy day
smell of burning leaves
in hand rolled cigarets
and I try to save at least the ones I can reach out and touch
compassion for the contiguous

homeboy was going to work for the VA when he first retired back and 80 but the philosophy seemed to be they needed shrinks to deny medical care. he wanted no truck with it. but since Clinton put that vet in charge things have changed.

ten four amigo
out to save the world
got on the bus when I was in high school
what a long strange we have had.
I have also heard it sang
that "religion is a light in the fog"

unbrief morning jam
verbiage and herbage

"Hold down the battins
I'm about to put on rouge",
and that's what she'd say
and I'd cling to the attitude
of an exceptional woman.

subtle cheeks
warm to the touch
healthy glow
and then she'd go

Happy Hanukkah, as the evening sun declines! May the road
bend with you as you go...May your countenance never lose your glow!
May the Lord bless you and keep you!

Chanukah happiness to you too, Steve
a week away from school and my happiness quotient is significantly upped!