Seriously, I don't know...

[Doreen Peri]

.... I really don't know how people do it.

I am having a hard time doing it.

I don't know how others seem to do it so very easily.

[judih]

yeah, other people.
who knows
but it keeps me going to guess

[Doreen Peri]

I can't even guess.
They rise in the morning, they shower,
they dress, they go off to their various
professions. In evenings when they return
home, the comb their children's hair, they
help them do their homework, they prepare
supper, have a cup of tea.

I can't even venture to guess how
they are different than me.

What keeps them going? Is the smile they wear
painted on their lips or is it sincere? Do they wonder
why they're here or what their purpose is?
Do they have another to hug, to kiss perhaps,
to ease the pains, to zap the dullness or memories
contained inside their minds?

Or do they have no pains? What's different
with them? Do they have joys to keep them going,
thoughts to reminisce? Why are their lives so
much more orderly than mine?

Why are they calm? Do they have no stresses?
My answers to these questions would only
be guesses and I'm much too tired to strive.
It seems they are much more capable
of staying quite vibrantly and happily alive.
What is it that they see that I cannot see?

I can't even venture to guess how
or why they are so completely different than me.

[judih]

the only comfort
is that they say the same -

discovering lice in their child's hair
neighbours gaze through your window
the scent of paint
the sound of music
they wonder how it would be
to be you

[Doreen Peri]

I wonder if they wonder.
I doubt it. They all seem so sane.
I wonder why they'd wonder about me
but just the same,
it's possible you're right,
I have no clue.

Do you sometimes wonder? I do
about them and him and her and you.